Happiness in Practice for Lifelong Peace, Ease, and Radiant Joy

Happiness in Practice for Lifelong Peace, Ease, and Radiant Joy

Transform everyday moments into a journey of gratitude, reflection, and true fulfillment.

In a world full of dramatic change and uncertainty, happiness can seem elusive—like a shimmering mirage amid life's frequent twists and turns. Sometimes it hides in the pages of an unfinished gratitude journal or lingers, unnoticed, beneath a rolled-up yoga mat. Yet, what does it truly mean to be "happy?” Is it the peace that settles over you in quiet moments, the deep contentment you feel after a shared laugh, the ease with which you navigate everyday challenges, or the fulfillment that comes from pursuing your passions? For me, happiness is a tapestry woven from all these threads—and perhaps even more, like joy, serenity, and connectedness. How do you know when you're happy? It might be that gentle warmth in your heart, a quiet certainty that all is well, or simply the unmistakable glow of being present in the moment.

The Science and Paradoxes of Happiness

Happiness is full of surprises and paradoxes. The more desperately we chase it, the more it seems to slip away. Ironically, some of the people who have experienced deep sorrow often find that their laughter rings the loudest. Research in positive psychology tells us that about 50 percent of our happiness may be influenced by genetics, around 25 percent by our life circumstances, and the remaining 25 percent by the choices and habits we cultivate. This means that while our biological wiring sets a baseline, we have a significant opportunity to shape our own well-being.

Scientists also differentiate between fleeting pleasure and deeper, more lasting happiness. Pleasure might come from a delicious meal or a social media like, but true happiness is that enduring glow—a quiet contentment that lingers after the moment has passed.

Overcoming Our Inner Obstacles

Our minds naturally lean toward negativity. This “negativity bias” means that one critical comment can often outweigh many compliments. Meanwhile, “hedonic adaptation” causes us to quickly adjust to new positive changes—like landing a dream job or buying a new gadget—so that the initial excitement fades and we begin to long for the next boost of pleasure.

Yet, there are ways to outsmart these mental habits.

Pillars of Happiness

Arthur C. Brooks, in his work on finding deep purpose in life, identifies four essential pillars of happiness:

● Faith: A connection to something larger than ourselves—whether through spirituality, meditation, or a bond with nature—can provide a steady source of strength in tough times.

● Family: Meaningful, loving relationships are crucial. Whether you’re reconnecting with old friends or deepening family bonds, these relationships enrich our lives.

● Friendship: Beyond family, having friends who laugh with us and support us reminds us that we’re never alone.

● Work and Service To Others: Finding purpose in what we do—whether through a career or volunteering—can bring a profound sense of fulfillment.

Cultivating Happiness Through Mindful Practices

Happiness grows when we intentionally nurture it. Here are some practical practices that work for people of all ages—from midlife women to children:

1. Savor the Good: When you experience a moment of joy—a warm cup of tea, a heartfelt compliment, or a peaceful walk—pause and fully absorb that feeling. Let it sink into your memory.

2. Practice Gratitude: Even on challenging days, noting three small things you’re thankful for can shift your focus from what’s missing to what’s already abundant in your life.

3. Embrace Novelty: You don’t need a grand vacation to spark joy. A new walking route, a rearranged living room, or lighting a special candle at breakfast can refresh your perspective.

4. Reflect Deeply: Instead of rushing from one fleeting pleasure to the next, take time to consider what makes you happy and why. Reflection deepens your awareness and helps you build lasting contentment.

5. Share Your Joy: Acts of kindness and generosity not only benefit others but also reinforce your own happiness. Whether through small gestures or larger volunteer efforts, giving joy away is a powerful antidote to loneliness.

Mindfulness practices, popularized by experts like Jon Kabat-Zinn, can also help us slow down and fully experience the present moment.

Celebrating Life’s Perpetually Fleeting Beauty

I’m reminded of a trip I once took during cherry blossom season—a time when the delicate blossoms bloom for only a few days, prompting people to pause and celebrate the beauty of transience. This tradition teaches us that every moment is precious because it is fleeting. I experienced a similar, quiet magic at home with a small patch of evening primroses. Each sunset, as their buds unfurled, my friends and I gathered in the garden to witness nature’s gentle reminder: to slow down, savor beauty, and be fully present.

For families, these moments can be shared to teach children about the value of living in the present. Consider starting a family tradition like an evening walk to watch the sunset or creating a gratitude journal together.

Cultivating Happiness Across Life Stages

Midlife is a unique chapter—a time of reflection, rediscovery, and reinvention. For midlife women, this period can be an opportunity to focus on what truly matters: your well-being, your relationships, and your personal passions. Whether you’re balancing the responsibilities of a career, family, or personal growth, remember that your choices and habits can guide you toward a richer, more fulfilling life. And for those in their later years, the journey toward happiness continues to evolve, enriched by the wisdom of lived experiences and cherished memories.

For our younger family members, learning to savor moments, appreciate small pleasures, and reflect on their experiences lays the foundation for lifelong happiness. Simple practices like sharing a meal, taking a quiet moment together, or even enjoying a spontaneous picnic can foster strong, joyful bonds.

Happiness is Not a Goal or Destination

Happiness isn’t a destination—it’s a journey built from everyday habits, intentional practices, and a deep appreciation for life’s fleeting moments. Whether you’re a midlife woman, an executive, a practitioner, entrepreneur, or a caregiver, you hold the power to nurture your happiness.

For me, this means planting evening primroses in my garden as a daily reminder to savor the moment and embrace change in my external and internal world. I hope you find inspiration in these reflections and practical tips to create your own path toward lasting joy.

With light, lightness and love,

Nina

Sources

● Martin E. P. Seligman, Authentic Happiness: Using the New Positive Psychology to Realize Your Potential for Lasting Fulfillment, 2002.

● Sonja Lyubomirsky, Kennon M. Sheldon, & David Schkade, “Pursuing Happiness: The Architecture of Sustainable Change,” Review of General Psychology, 2005.

● Baumeister, R. F., et al., “Bad is Stronger Than Good,” Psychological Review, 2001.

● Arthur C. Brooks, From Strength to Strength: Finding Success, Happiness, and Deep Purpose in the Second Half of Life, 2022.

● Jon Kabat-Zinn, Full Catastrophe Living: Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress, Pain, and Illness, 1990.

Mapping Your Joy: A Personal Exercise

Take a piece of paper and position it lengthwise. Draw a horizontal line across the center. Along this line, make tic marks in five-year increments for each decade of your life. For example, if you’re 40 years old, mark the segments as 1–10, 11–20, 21–30, and 31–40. If you are past 40, add another decade, etc.

Now, focus on the top half of the page. Starting at the left (age 1) and moving right through each segment, let your thoughts flow freely—without judgment or overthinking. Jot down memories or moments that capture distinct feelings of happiness: whether it’s peace, joy, bliss, giddiness, ecstasy, contentment, satisfaction, or fulfillment. These represent your "ABOVE THE LINE" memories of happiness.

After completing this exercise for each decade, take a moment to review your entries. Ask yourself:

● What themes or recurring experiences do you notice?

● Are there specific sensations in your body that these memories evoke?

● What insights or patterns are emerging about your personal journey with happiness?

This exercise is another way of taking gratitude to a new level—transforming it into an evolving, reflective practice that you can revisit each day, week, or month. By routinely mapping your joy, you deepen your awareness of the moments that truly enrich your life, guiding you to nurture more of those experiences moving forward.

Ready to begin your own journey into your MidStream Momentum?

Schedule a discovery session today to explore how we can navigate this transformative phase together and unlock the full potential of your midlife experience!